Soldiers' Angel - Holly Aho

Ever heard of the Smiling Frog Solar Light? Probably not, but I'm sure you've seen some over the top directions and warnings on products before. One fine example was the warnings that came with my kid's Power Ranger doll.
Do not:
1. aim toy at anyone
2. hit anyone with toy
3. poke anyone with toy
4. swing toy at anyone
5. step on toy
Those warnings had me rolling. For days I repeated, "Do not poke anyone with toy."

That is nothing compared to the instructions and warnings that come with the Smiling Frog Solar Light. I am not making this up. I am going to provide you with the actual manual that comes with the item, and a link to read the manual in PDF format if you need to prove to yourself it's for real. Here's the manual.

Safety Warnings and Precautions

WARNING: When using product, basic safety precautions should always be followed to reduce the risk of personal injury and damage to equipment.

Read all instructions before using this product!

1. Keep work area clean. Cluttered areas invite injuries.

2. Observe work area conditions. Keep work area well lit. Position the Smiling Frog Solar Light
in an unobstructed area that receives sunlight at least six hours a day.

3. Store idle equipment. When not in use, products must be stored in a dry location to inhibit
damage from moisture and salt air.

4. Check for damaged parts. Before using any product, any part that appears damaged should be carefully checked to determine that it will operate properly and perform its intended function.
Check for any broken or damaged parts and any other conditions that may affect its operation.
Replace or repair damaged or worn parts immediately. Do not use the Solar Light if any switch
does not turn on and off properly.

5. Replacement parts and accessories. When servicing, use only identical replacement parts.
Use of any other parts will void the warranty.

6. Always check hardware and assembled parts after assembling. All connections should be
tight and hardware tightened.

7. Keep children away. Children must never be allowed in the work area. Do not let them handle
the Solar Light.

8. Dress properly. Protective, electrically nonconductive clothes and nonskid footwear are recommended when working with the Smiling Frog Solar Light. Wear restrictive hair covering to
contain long hair.

9. Use eye protection. Always wear ANSI approved impact safety goggles when setting up this
product.

10. Maintain products with care. Keep the Solar Light clean for better and safer performance.

Follow instructions for set up and changing batteries. Inspect the Solar Light periodically. if damaged, have it repaired by an authorized technician.

11. Do not overreach. Keep proper footing and balance at all times.

12. Use the right Solar Light for the job. Do not attempt to force a small Solar Light to do the work of a larger Solar Light. There are certain applications for which this Solar Light was
designed. Do not modify this Solar Light and do not use this Solar Light for a purpose for which it was not intended.

13. Do not set up the Solar Light if under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Read warning labels on prescriptions to determine if your judgement or reflexes are impaired while taking drugs. If there is any doubt, do not set up the Smiling Frog Solar Light.

14. Use only Batteries of the type recommended.

15. Do not mix old and new batteries.

16. Batteries should all be Nickel-Cadmium.

17. Remove batteries if the Smiling Frog Solar Light is not used for a long period of time.

18. Keep the Solar Panel free of dirt, dust and grime. Dust covering the Solar Panel will block out sunlight causing a decrease or stoppage of efficiency in recharging the batteries.

WARNING: NiCad batteries must be disposed of properly. Do not incinerate. Batteries may
burst, causing personal injury and/or property damage. Contact your local hazardous waste disposal authority for proper disposal.

WARNING: The warnings, cautions, and instructions discussed in this instruction manual cannot
cover all possible conditions and situations that may occur (although they certainly tried). It must be understood by the operator that common sense and caution are factors which cannot be built into this product, but must be supplied by the operator.

Assembly/ Operation

---->!!! Your Smiling Frog Solar Light comes completely assembled.

Ok, I just have to say something here. It comes completely assembled? Then why the hell am I standing here in my clean, unobstructed work area with my children at a babysitters, wearing my protective, electrically nonconductive clothes and nonskid footwear complete with hair net and ANSI approved impact safety goggles, having just cleaned out my medicine cabinet and consulting a physician's desk reference?????? If.It.Is.Already.Assembled.??

Continuing on....

The Smiling Frog Solar Light requires special conditions for set up and operation. It is important that you read the entire manual to become familiar with the product BEFORE you use the Smiling Frog Solar Light. Before operating the Smiling Frog Solar Light be sure that you have all parts described in the Parts List and
Assembly Diagram located on the last pages of this manual.

1. Decide where you want to place the Smiling Frog Solar Light. Choose a location that receives full, direct sunlight a minimum of six hours a day. The location should not be near nighttime light sources such as porch lights or streetlights as this will cause the Solar Light
to remain off.

The Smiling Frog Solar Light must be set on a flat, even and stable surface. The Smiling Frog Solar Light is water resistant to protect against normal daily elements. The Smiling Frog Solar Light is not waterproof and must not be set in water such as pools or ponds.

2. The Smiling Frog Solar Light will need to charge for at least six hours before using it for the first time.

3. Located on the bottom of the Smiling Frog Solar Light is a panel with a “ON”/”OFF” Button (1)-see Figure 1. Pressing down on the “ON”/”OFF” Button (1) will turn the Smiling Frog Solar Light on or off. After the initial charge (Step 2) is set, check to see that the Light (3) is on by viewing the Smiling Frog at night or in a dark location. If the Light (3) is not lit, press the “ON”/”OFF” Button (1) again until it is in the “ON” position-see Figure 1.

Don't believe me? Here's the link: Smiling Frog Solar Light Manual.

Wanna see a picture of this dangerous light that could cause over reaching?

I could NOT make this stuff up if I tried!!!