Stars n Stripes 4 U

Now this is the low man in the gene pool.

A Brazilian man died Tuesday when he tried to open what police believe was a rocket-propelled grenade with a sledgehammer in a mechanical workshop on the outskirts of Rio de Janeiro.

Another man who was in the workshop at the time of the explosion was rushed to a hospital with severe burns, a police officer told Reuters. The workshop was destroyed and several cars parked outside caught fire.

Police found several unexploded army issue rocket-propelled grenades in the workshop. They believe the ammunition had been brought there by scavengers wanting to sell them as scrap metal, but they also are investigating a possible link to Rio's heavily armed drug gangs who often raid military bases

Some people are to smart for there own good.

So what have we learned today class??? Don't use a sledgehammer to open things that can go BOOM!!!

An additional way to support the VFW National Home for Children is to collect and send Campbell's Soup Labels and other participating UPC's to the Home.

Some of the eligible products are Campbells soups, tomato juices, Soup at Hand, Chunky soups, Chili, Franco American products, Pepperidge Farm, Pace, V8, Prego, and Healthy Request.

Please send the labels directly to the home at

VFW National Home for Children
3573 S Waverly Road
Easton Rapids, MI 48827

The VFW National Home For Children is a 70 acre neighborhood of homes and facilities located in Eaton Rapids, Michigan. The National Home cares for the children and families of our nations veterans. Founded in 1925, the national Home has been a haven for veterans families for more then 80 years.

Services are available in two unique programs, the single parent family program and the residential program. The single parent family program provides opportunities for single parents and their children in a goal - oriented, one to three year program designed to assist them in rebuilding a stronger, healthier family unit.

The residential program provides long term care for children without their parent(s). Professional child-care workers provide love, care and guidance in a family like setting. Children remain in this program through high school with the availability of post high school programs and services.

The National Home for Children is a 501(c)(3) non profit organization. The home is supported solely by contributions from private individuals and organizations. The h home remains privately funded after 80 years of love and care to the children and families of veterans.

Unlike any other child care facility in the world, the VFW national Home for Children focuses its efforts on the children and families of the men and women who served our country. Patriotism and respect for past and present soldiers permeates all National Home programs.

Not only are we trying to find the state with the most magnetic personality, we are also trying to find the most bizarre magnet to send.

Thanks to Tiffany a.k.a. The Mom from Florida, I think we found it.

Here kitty, kitty... Meow!!!

Can you imagine seeing a humvee with this sticking out of it...

Operation MAG-NEATO update:


When ever any of our military need us we are there to spread our angel wings. No request is to big or small for us angels. This silly operation is no different. If there is anything that an angel can do to lift the moral and off set the boredom from the big sandbox, an angel will do it.


As of today we have, Arizona, California, Florida, Illinois, Kansas, Maine, Michigan, New York, North Dakota, Ohio, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Texas, Virgina, and Washington. Not to bad for a new operation.


As of today Illinois with 88 has taken the lead with their a,b,c, of magnets. Arizona has collected 67 magnets. Florida has called in the calvary with 39. Ohio has 23 and still holds the title of the "fastest angel wings." Texas has 21 and they are still going strong. Virginia is at 15. Thanks to a very crafty angel, Maine has sent in a dozen. North Dakota and Pennsylvania both are sitting at 2.


It is still anyones race to see whos state has the most magnetic personality.


Stay tuned for more updates on this crazy special mission.


Todays update has been brought to you by the proud makers of the MRE.
Yum!! Unidentified meat!

National Guard Leadership:

'Commander' - Whoever starts the unit.

'Second in Command' - His best friend or closest relative.

'Auxiliary Commander' - His wife or mom.

'Intelligence Chief' - The guy with a police scanner and his mom's email account.

'Informant' - the first one of us who gets caught doing anything illegal.

National Guard Rank Structure:

'General' - National Guard Commander (Number of stars on hat reflect size of head.)

'Colonel' - His best friend.

'Major' - Wives, moms, friends and whoever lets you use their property to 'train.'

'Captain' - New guy.

'Officer' - Guy who pulls you over for having no tags on your truck.

'Private' - Highest rank actually attained by commander before being kicked out of the real military.

National Guard Command sizes:

'Battalion' - A National Guard Unit with 3-5 guys who show up for every meeting.

'Brigade' - Unit with more than 6 guys.

'Division' - Harder than subtraction but easier than algebra.

'Company' - Place where we order our National Guard stuff.

'Platoon' - Movie about Vietnam which gives us 'flashbacks,' (even though we were in high school at the time.)

'Squad' - Guys in the ambulance who come out when one of us falls or accidentally shoots someone during training.

National Guard Unit Specialties and Capabilities:

'Internet National Guard' - Number unknown. Source for secret information the government does not want anyone to know. Capable of sending mean faxes, SPAM and flaming email when provoked. (USCMike, PMIL, EAGLEFLT, etc.)

'Mail Order National Guard' (MONG) - Numbering in the dozens. Most often seen on television news wearing home made uniforms with awards and patches for wars we never fought in. Capable of newsletter creation, mean faxes, SPAM and creation of tons of 'documentation' when provoked.

'Shortwave Radio National Guard' - About a half dozen active. Specialize in selling books, videos, gold, silver and canned food while begging for donations so we can 'keep getting the truth out.' Capable of basically embarrassing themselves when provoked.

'State National Guard' - Sometimes as many as 20 guys per state. Capable of enhancing careers of federal agents and infighting like schoolgirls when provoked.

National Guard Terminology:

'National Guard Headquarters' - Mom's basement, garage or the trailer of whoever has the fax machine.

'Enemy' - NWO, UN and other National Guard leaders who lie about me.

'Full auto' - Three in front seat, four in back, National Guard stuff in trunk.

'Operation' - Stuff the doctor does after the squad takes you to the hospital for hurting yourself.

'New World Order' - Bar codes on beer cans, warnings on cigarette packs, cameras in K-mart and anything else we don't like or understand.

'Common Law Grand Jury' - Ten or more old people practicing law without a clue.

'Federal Agent' - Any National Guard commander who says anything bad about me.

'Global Conspiracy' - Why tornados target our trailers, why our sisters/wives have facial hair and why we only manage to make minimum wage (even though many of us have a GED.)

'U.N. Troops' - Foreign soldiers hidden everywhere, sent in by NWO to spy on the National Guard. Anyone wearing anything light blue in color.

'Leaderless Resistance' - Where we do something really stupid without any pre-planning or supervision.

'Training' - Cleaning guns while eating MRE's and watching the movie 'Red Dawn.'

'God, Guns and Guts' - Well, we've got guns.

Friendly fire - isn't.

Recoilless rifles - aren't.

Suppressive fires - won't.

You are not Superman; Marines and fighter pilots take note.

A sucking chest wound is Nature's way of telling you to slow down.

If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.

Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo and not want to waste a bullet on you.

If at first you don't succeed, call in an airstrike.

If you are forward of your position, your artillery will fall short.

Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.

Never go to bed with anyone crazier than yourself.

Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.

If your attack is going really well, it's an ambush.

The enemy diversion you're ignoring is their main attack.

The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions: when they're ready. & when you're not.

No OPLAN ever survives initial contact.

There is no such thing as a perfect plan.

Five second fuzes always burn three seconds.

There is no such thing as an atheist in a foxhole.

A retreating enemy is probably just falling back and regrouping

Advice and instructions taken from actual military sources. Some of these guys must have had a sense of humor

"Aim towards the enemy."
--Instruction printed on U.S. Rocket Launcher

"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."
--U.S. Marine Corps

"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."
--USAF Ammo Troop

"If the enemy is in range, so are you."
--Infantry Journal

"A slipping gear could let your m203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."
--Army's magazine of prevention maintenance

"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed."
--U.S.

Air Force manual
"Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo."
--Infantry Journal

"Tracers work both ways."
--U.S. Army Ordnance

"Five-second fuses only last three seconds."
--Infantry Journal

"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."
--David Hackworth

"If your attack is going too well, you're walking into an ambush."
--Infantry Journal

"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection."
--Joe Gay

"Any ship can be a minesweeper....once."
--Anon

"Never tell the platoon sergeant you have nothing to do."
--Unknown Marine Recruit

"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
--Infantry Journal

"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him."
--USAF Ammo Troop

Q: What do bin Laden and Hiroshima have in common?
A: Nothing, ...................yet.

Q: How do you play Taliban bingo?
A: B-52...F-16...B-1...

Q: What is the Taliban's national bird?
A: Duck

Q: How is bin Laden like Fred Flintstone?
A: Both may look out their windows and see Rubble.

Q: What does Osama bin laden and General Custer have in common?
A: They both want to know where those Tomahawks are coming from!

Q: What's the five day forecast for Afghanistan?
A: Two days.

Q: What's the difference between Christmas and Osama bin Laden?
A: There will be a Christmas in December

Q: How many bin Laden terrorists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: No one may ever know.

Q: What's orange and looks good on Taliban militiamen?
A: Napalm.

Q: What do you get when you cross a B-52 bomber and Osama bin Ladin?
A: an expensive fire work show

Q: How do you clear a Afghanistan bingo hall?
A: Yell B-52 as loud as you can

The soldier serving overseas, far from home was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote breaking off their engagement and asking for her photograph back.

He went out and collected from his friends all the unwanted photographs of women that he could find, bundled them all together and sent them back with a note saying........... "Regret cannot remember which one is you -- please keep your photo and return the others."